[OD]

"Is our job ready for delivery for our launch on Saturday?"

What job?

[roto]

I don't moan...I just charge more and assure the proper psychological profiles are completed for prospective clients. I reserve the right to increase my rates to those who see fluffy bunnies on most images in the Rorschach test.

Originally Posted by steharg

Working in the design industry is like being a dirty robot whore.

And I don't care who found that first, like Disco said...it's (fucking) brilliant.

[StisterMeve]

Brilliant. The people in the American office put this shitty video on their website.

One of our customers contacted the German marketing coordinator over here asking if they could get the original video to play in a presentation, as they won't have an internet connection. She's gone ahead and said yeah, fine, we'll send it over. Just got the question:

"Is 2 million kilobytes too big to email?"

Amazing. Just spent about 20 minutes explaining why this won't be happening.

[KingCraig]

"Computers" are now an important part of working life in most industries. I think it's about time people started to learn the basics.

[StisterMeve]

I genuinely think people should have to pass some sort of test, like driving a car.

[shofty]

Originally Posted by StisterMeve

I genuinely think people should have to pass some sort of test, like driving a car.

couldn't agree more. i lose hours every month to people ringing me. i've rebuilt in excess of 10 laptops this year for people who think its fine to take AV off. two of them i've seen twice.

there are various basic courses, but when you suggest them, people think cos they can walk into pcworld they don't need one. sorry, but it doesnt work that way. you should have a basic understanding of the dangers of the net before you're let loose on it.

[hawken]

There should be a test.

I was at my mates place the other day and he asked me if I have any spare Mac's because his is broken. He was honestly about to throw this machine away. I did a quick command S boot up and brought the machine back to life, took all of 3 minutes of my time.

[Bishop]

Your are a good friend. I would have taken it and said it was trash but I know of a guy who will buy old mac parts for 50 bucks.

[Matt_e11]

Watching my dad try and work a computer is like watching a caveman bashing stones against a rock

[ben]

The worst thing with computer non-savvy parents is that they can't comprehend that often things 'just happen' (can be triggered by any possible thing or process that's going on at the time – like this one time the front display of my laptop stopped working because I updated iTunes etc.).

Therefore, I always get blamed for stuff like "Ever since you disconnected and reconnected my keyboard, at times sound will stop in the middle of the song" And then there is no use explaining it.

[LittleMick]

Same here. My mum won't let me use the computer one time because I installed a game and the Internet stopped working a week later.

[Matt_e11]

My dad thinks everyone is after his bank account details!
His computers about 5-6 years old, everytime i go round he will ask me to have a look at it. "its running really slow opening some programs, I'm sure its a virus, them hackers trying to get into my bank account"

No its just old!

[Bishop]

I am the go to guy for my nana in law. she non stop downloads fake virus scanners that render her PC useless.
She rings to let me know that her virus protection has been updated and everything is going okay.

bless her

[Klang]

Consider yourselves lucky, my mum user her computer to co-ordinate EDL marches.

[OD]

Well, the design's okay, but it's just not "wowing" us, if you know what I mean?

It's a PowerPoint template footer...

[ben]

A naked lady somewhere in the design ought to sort that out, OD!

[OD]

"We like the cover of the new design, but the interior of the previous design... Can you do a new visual?"

Sure thing. Done and sent...

"It looks like all you've done is put the cover from the last design onto the interior of the design before that..."

...

Very close to my first binning of a freelance client. Never had to do that before...

Good way of doing it (without just calling them a cunt)?

[jamblo]

Tell them you'll "See them (you) next Tuesday", but don't turn up.

//chortle

[Bishop]

this coont just emailed me and asked me to whip up some posters and sent me istock pics with the istock watermark on them and shit tacks when I said I would be charging him and that I couldn't use those images.

amazing

[OD]

Can we make the backgrounds of the photos as "in-focus" as the person in the foreground to bring out the detail?

On images from a recent shoot where the photographer was specifically briefed by the client to make the background of every shot soft-focus...