Fuck Off

oli
oli
Posts: 14,145 in General Discussion
A General thread for things that piss you off,
5 years ago these things were annoying me : (still do tbh)

soap operas,
clients,
that malcom glazier bloke,
935-manu.jpg
demented leprechaun in a fucking baseball hat,

thanks, that is all.
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Comments

  • chips
    chips
    Mr chips to you Posts: 4,401
    fuck off:

    people who drive hummers.
    wasps/hornets/bees
    Lesley Garrett


    garrett_head.jpg
  • gray
    gray
    i still want paying Posts: 5,149
    haha looks like my old boss... company went bust :D
  • adras
    adras
    1337 Posts: 2,562
    fuck off: marketing people, who try to be graphic designers.
  • Scott
    Scott
    sanddancer Posts: 3,235
    f o: PPL who think they can make a living outa web design by using frontpage and publisher and also ppl who think they know it all and how their work is amazing when it just isn't!
  • JiRaffe
    JiRaffe
    Ur mother's ur brother? Posts: 869
    fuck off:
    McDonalds (just seen Super Size Me)
    Asda Shortbread (bought a big value 3-pack only to discover that i only saved 10p and the biscuits are smaller)
  • dan
    dan
    Iris Folder Posts: 2,630
    I like cheese on toast
  • pat
    pat
    dilaudid Posts: 9,337
    fuck off:
    cars that stop outside your house to take phone calls
    warwick team on university challenge on monday
    scott mills in the chris moyles slot
  • stickmus
    stickmus
    hmmm... Posts: 2,106
    Haha: Scott Mills in Chris Moyles' slot
  • cam
    cam
    vague™ Posts: 5,637
    stickmus wrote:
    Haha: Scott Mills in Chris Moyles' slot

    unwanted mental image of the day.
  • pat
    pat
    dilaudid Posts: 9,337
    oof, did you have to?
  • sleepingfish
    sleepingfish
    css is for divs Posts: 4,411
    Students who stand outside your house at Stupid O'Clock and talk shite at the top of their voices.
    Mondays.
    Spamcocks.
    IE for Mac.
  • aaron
    aaron
    Senior Member Posts: 347
    fuck off:
    demanding, rude clients with no money
    anyone who knows my direct line number
  • tomson
    tomson
    The in between is mine Posts: 4,208
    fuck off:
    the god squad
    ITV
    schoolkids
    fat people on buses
  • aaron
    aaron
    Senior Member Posts: 347
    i second religion
  • sleepingfish
    sleepingfish
    css is for divs Posts: 4,411
    Reality TV.
    Celebrities.
    Celebrity Reality TV.
  • oli
    oli
    Posts: 14,145
    tomson wrote:
    fat people on buses
    fat people who buy shitloads of food, and top it off with a diet coke. fat bastards.
    god squad thirded.
  • pat
    pat
    dilaudid Posts: 9,337
    Anglicans
    Doctors
    juicy fruit chewing gum

    Fuck on:
    That 70's show
  • flatcat
    flatcat
    Metaphysical Composer Posts: 863
    fuck off:
    Crappy ass Monday production work.
    Crappy ass clients that pay nothing to what they demand.
    everyone. Especially stupid people.
  • Scott
    Scott
    sanddancer Posts: 3,235
    clients who ring u up asking you to do more work for them without paying extra.
    GEEKS who call people stuff like noobs and l33t n stuff argh
    charvas (learn to dress)
  • Joewebber
    Joewebber
    Senior Member Posts: 759
    fuck off: dodgy beer that gives you the shits
  • JiRaffe
    JiRaffe
    Ur mother's ur brother? Posts: 869
    l33t?
    charvas?
  • pat
    pat
    dilaudid Posts: 9,337
    l33t=language that internet gaming geeks talk in, with numbers and such "elite"
    Charvas = Kevs, townies, Scallies etc.
  • Unknown
    *
    Jose Mourinho, big headed idiot - take a looksie at dis!

    Arsenal, goddam them, keep winning.
    Peope saying Rooney is so great - Smith and Van Bistelrooy are MUs best strikers.
    Traffic
    My computer crashing
    IE only sites
    Chelsea
    iTunes, I WANT MY £5 MONTHLY GIFT - I SHOULD HAVE HAD IT 4 DAYS AGO.
    Protected WMAs.
    One of my 'friends*, who is over the top, reckoning he is better at footy than me.
    Man Us website's login box not appearing in Firefox. I have to use IE for it!
    This thing in Sims 2 that makes your sims never be happy it seems.
    My squash leagues secutary, I keep losing, and going up leagues, well, it's not his fault, but why do I keep going up, tell me, any other bermy league secretarts hjere!?
    Anyone thinking my list is too long
    .Arsenal again.
    Mourinho again.
    iTunes agaiun.
    Protected WMAs again.
    Mourinho again.
    Lincoln City fans saying they were hard done by by the ref, for about the 10th time in 11 games this season. Just cos they were 2-0 up agenst us wiv 10 mins left, and we drew... They had ref on their side all the time. Besides, without the ref 'against' them, they'd do worse anyway - it's easyier to scorwe against Lincoln than get a free kick on target - if it was on target, I'm sure their goalie would spooon it.
    Mourinho again.


    *Well, you know by now.....

    PS: I share your pain with WIndow Galzer oli......
  • Stickman
    Stickman
    Expert Posts: 5,502
    Adam.
  • Unknown
    schoolkids

    Ahem, schoolkids in this foruym!
  • Stickman
    Stickman
    Expert Posts: 5,502
    Exactly.



    sigh
  • Igor Rizzo
    Igor Rizzo
    Senior Member Posts: 153
    This thread is getting funny.
  • fluff
    fluff
    Registered User Posts: 40
    fuck right off: clients that don't pay, ignore politely written threats and then make me have to sue them... by the way - you can do that online - https://www.moneyclaim.gov.uk/csmco2/index.jsp - - fuckers - -
  • tomson
    tomson
    The in between is mine Posts: 4,208
    fuck off (revisited):
    football
    footballers
    footballs
    footie
    people who bang on about any of the above
  • Scott
    Scott
    sanddancer Posts: 3,235
    this thread
  • seen.to
    seen.to
    unusual suspect ™ DelawherePosts: 6,371
    Fuck off Dr Wankstain who reverses into my car in which I'm carrying my wife and 5 month old son then gets offended when I jump out and tell the cunt that he is a cunt repeatedly for 2 minutes whilst explaining that he needs to stop looking at me like that or he'll be counting his teeth.

    Fuck off again Dr Wankstain for asking me to speak 'English' because, dear Dr Wankstain, I am English, so why don't you learn to fucking speak and while you are at it learn to fucking drive.

    Fuck off again Dr Wankstain for offering, through quivering lips and rapidly browning trousers, to pay me to have my car repaired as soon as I get you a quote, then changing your mind and wanting to go through your insurers but refusing to give me your insurers information.

    Claim is now expected to be paid thursday.

    Fuck off Stan Smallcock for trying to chat up my wife at work twice this week with the line ''I'll warm you up later, your husband doesn't need to know'' whilst putting your arm around her waist. She told you to fuck off and if you do it again then next time I WILL put that hammer through the side of your head you stupid little cunt.

    Fuck off Mike Ponceynonce for trying to comfort my wife after her ordeal with Stan Smallcock then e-mailing her to come visit you at home anytime and rest her head on your broad shoulders before signing off 'love always'. Try and chat up my wife and I WILL teach you a new way to play baseball using your head as the ball.

    Guess you can guess that I'm vexed atm. Had to take this vent opportunity. Now I'll fuck off from this thread.
  • oli
    oli
    Posts: 14,145
    Dr Wankstain, Stan Smallcock & Mike Ponceynonce a motley gang indeed. Just move back over here, you know it makes sense.
  • seen.to
    seen.to
    unusual suspect ™ DelawherePosts: 6,371
    oli wrote:
    Dr Wankstain, Stan Smallcock & Mike Ponceynonce a motley gang indeed. Just move back over here, you know it makes sense.

    Often tempting mate, very often.
  • Mik
    Mik
    Award Winning™ Posts: 14,633
    tomson wrote:
    fuck off (revisited):
    football
    footballers
    footballs
    footie
    people who bang on about any of the above


    men who dont like football - unnatural :)
  • stickmus
    stickmus
    hmmm... Posts: 2,106
    Fuck off!
  • sleepingfish
    sleepingfish
    css is for divs Posts: 4,411
    Hangovers.
    The taste of kebab the morning after.
    The headache.
    The shear rudeness of being expected to be productive today.
    Alcohol.
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    Fucking fuck right off...

    builders

    electricians

    plumbers

    carpenters

    accountants

    that bloke who's always coughing in the back of my head on the train

    all of the bar staff at my local

    dumb-ass fcukin cave-dwelling retarded sheep shagging valleys freedom fighter clients who ask me will I be travelling back to London today

    all fuckers
  • dan
    dan
    Iris Folder Posts: 2,630
    tomson wrote:
    fuck off (revisited):
    football
    footballers
    footballs
    footie
    people who bang on about any of the above

    footballers wives
    though you remembered people who bang on the above
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    Fuck off : seen.to

    so i can come round and comfort your wife.
    then torch your car.
  • seen.to
    seen.to
    unusual suspect ™ DelawherePosts: 6,371
    weldo wrote:
    Fuck off : seen.to

    so i can come round and comfort your wife.
    then torch your car.

    Do what you cunt?
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    seen.to wrote:
    Do what you cunt?

    this is much more like it :lol:
  • smallbeer
    smallbeer
    I Ain't Losing Any Sleep™ Posts: 5,141
    quite surprised it took 3 pages to start getting down to it.

    ding ding.
  • pat
    pat
    dilaudid Posts: 9,337
    is there a feud between seen.to and weldo? Or is it just a plain old fashioned cuss-match
  • tomson
    tomson
    The in between is mine Posts: 4,208
    They were lovers back in the day, it all went horribly wrong though. Shame.
  • seen.to
    seen.to
    unusual suspect ™ DelawherePosts: 6,371
    pat wrote:
    is there a feud between seen.to and weldo? Or is it just a plain old fashioned cuss-match

    Wish I knew!

    Weldo - What's ya fucking problem?
  • Scott
    Scott
    sanddancer Posts: 3,235
    he said 'fuck off: seen.to so he can come round and....nah harsh as oout that like man ya kna eh witche ona boot man al knock ya out in a min u £%£^&$£$"$£& - charva talk

    still quite funi tho, just reading them, specially at speed!
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    seen.to wrote:
    Wish I knew!

    Weldo - What's ya fucking problem?

    Whoaa there matey.....!!!

    Only messing.....seemed like a funny thing to say.....although sounds like maybe you've had a bad few days and it's hit a raw nerve.....sorry.

    'Twas only meant as a josh.....I ain't really gonna fly 3000 miles to comfort anyone. Think about it.
  • gray
    gray
    i still want paying Posts: 5,149
    haha weldo with both feet in his mouth of late :D quality
  • seen.to
    seen.to
    unusual suspect ™ DelawherePosts: 6,371
    weldo wrote:
    Whoaa there matey.....!!!

    Only messing.....seemed like a funny thing to say.....although sounds like maybe you've had a bad few days and it's hit a raw nerve.....sorry.

    'Twas only meant as a josh.....I ain't really gonna fly 3000 miles to comfort anyone. Think about it.

    Apology accepted - thanks :)

    You hit a total raw nerve m8.

    My wife's been really stressed and actually a little traumatised by the treatment she was getting from Stan Smallcock at work and I was totally prepared to go serve the cunt. My wife kept talking me out of it because she doesn't want me in jail and that caused us to row between us. Been a fucking miserable week. :mad:

    Fortunately I've recently won a 3 month contract so we could afford for my wife to just quit her job without worry and now we won't go bankrupt for at least another few months :)
  • TEnterprise
    TEnterprise
    Senior Member Posts: 139
    Seen:To - chill dude - you gonna take on the world?

    You sound whacked - so stop before you gets whacked
  • Brown
    Brown
    volkswagen yellow & gold Posts: 6,209
    seen.to wrote:
    Stan Smallcock
    haha
  • sleepingfish
    sleepingfish
    css is for divs Posts: 4,411
    There is help out there seen.to

    http://www2.angliatv.com/trisha/contact.shtml
  • gray
    gray
    i still want paying Posts: 5,149
    seen.to wrote:
    she doesn't want me in jail and that caused us to row between us.

    how does she feel about you being stuck in that software box though? ;)
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    I'm glad we're friends again.

    I should have learned by now that whatever i say, however badly I may come across, no matter how controversial my opinions and offensively they may be taken, as long as I add a tiny little smiley icon, I'll get away with it :D

    Example : Check it out

    You're all cunts :wink:
    Your mother sucks cocks in hell :thumbsup:

    See !!
  • sleepingfish
    sleepingfish
    css is for divs Posts: 4,411
    Whats your problem?
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    He He He
  • stickmus
    stickmus
    hmmm... Posts: 2,106
    Let me give it a go then

    Sound's like his wife's been seen.to ;)
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    Naughty. But Nice.
  • Narate
    Narate
    Royalty™ Posts: 3,313
    Fuck Off:

    People that are new to the internet
    People using mobile phones on public transport
    My car keeps breaking
    Burning Out my HDD and loosing my old work
    Customers
    Cost of petrol
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    weldo wrote:
    Your mother sucks cocks in hell :thumbsup:

    Your mother cooks socks in hell.
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    mark wrote:
    Your mother cooks socks in hell.
    Indeed - a classic case of spoonerism !!
  • seen.to
    seen.to
    unusual suspect ™ DelawherePosts: 6,371
    Too many to quote but you all made me larf :lol: thanks!

    PS It's my dad that sucks cocks
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    Too much info....seen.to

    But thanks all the same !!! :cheers:
  • dorian
    dorian
    i do lines Posts: 3,200
    people who want curvy ( I quote: "no straight lines" ) websites.

    insipid morons.
  • aaron
    aaron
    Senior Member Posts: 347
    Darius, Darius, Darius.

    Can't believe I forgot that one.
  • oli
    oli
    Posts: 14,145
    We might as well stick the whole lot in, Gareth Gates, Will Young, Fattie Scottish . . etc
  • smallbeer
    smallbeer
    I Ain't Losing Any Sleep™ Posts: 5,141
    I reckon we've found a successor to the "what you listening to..." thread.
  • oli
    oli
    Posts: 14,145
    DT room 101 :)
  • Option Click
    Option Click
    Dreamytime Escort Posts: 38
    • that fucking 'Big Brootha" voiceover bloke.
    • pikeys
    • stupid clients
    • football
    • screaming kids
    • Ticketmaster's crap online booking system
  • pat
    pat
    dilaudid Posts: 9,337
    5's "The Farm" i.e Vanilla Ice + Stan Collymore
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    Edith Bowman and that prick Colin fella with the Irish accent.
    Christ, can they be anymore annoying ??

    Maybe Dermot O'Leary...
    Liam Gallagher too.....and while I'm at it.....Young Conservatives ....
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    Young Farmers
    Scott Mills
    the entire cast of Hollyoaks (apart from Izzy, who gives me wood)
    Photoshop
    Printers
    Apple Mac
    the freelance developer who is sitting next to me at work practising air drumming to the nu-metal blasting form his earphones

    sigh
  • weldo
    weldo
    if only i was arsed ... Posts: 12,375
    mark wrote:
    the entire cast of Hollyoaks (apart from Izzy, who gives me wood)
    I think it's the writers that need rounding up and destroying, rather than the cast.....it's them wafer thin plots and dodgy storylines that wind me up
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    Fuck off Monday mornings.
  • Gdr
    Gdr
    Registered User Posts: 16
    mark wrote:
    Fuck off Monday mornings.
    Fuckin' right :thumbsdow
  • Stickman
    Stickman
    Expert Posts: 5,502
    Hear hear.
  • sleepingfish
    sleepingfish
    css is for divs Posts: 4,411
    Big double fuck off to Mondays in general, but especially Monday mornings.

    And being surrounded by ill, sniffing, coughing, phlegming people who are determined to spread their diseases.
  • smallbeer
    smallbeer
    I Ain't Losing Any Sleep™ Posts: 5,141
    zvirus can fuck right off for a start.

    my boss and her fucking annoying "I'm trying to be posh" telephone voice.

    school kids on the train today.

    tv ads for internet companies that repeat the url 29,000 times in 3 minutes.

    this is actually quite theraputic.
  • Mik
    Mik
    Award Winning™ Posts: 14,633
    this bastard lung cancer that I have been infected by. - ajoke

    thanks for all the messages of support but i was kidding. :shock:

    think it might just be man flu. maybe a joke to far.
  • Unknown
    Fuck off Monday mornings.

    Thirded.
  • tomson
    tomson
    The in between is mine Posts: 4,208
    what?
  • smallbeer
    smallbeer
    I Ain't Losing Any Sleep™ Posts: 5,141
    tomson wrote:
    what?
    let him get through his key stage 1 before tackling him with difficult questions like that tom.
  • Unknown
    Ahhh... stuff it - 'll edit out the amazon studff, but I still third Monday mornings.
  • Stickman
    Stickman
    Expert Posts: 5,502
    Din - It's been everywhere for a while now and I'm sick of seeing it.

    Robbie Williams - as above.
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    Stickman wrote:
    Din - It's been everywhere for a while now and I'm sick of seeing it.

    Robbie Williams - as above.

    Not as sick as you're gonna be, I'm nowhere near finished with din ;)

    Back on topic, isonorm and cholla can fuck off (double ;) )
  • stickmus
    stickmus
    hmmm... Posts: 2,106
    Fuck off: cunting adware and the like. No I don't want fucking SirSearch every time i miss spell a fucking web address you fucking wanker.
  • oli
    oli
    Posts: 14,145
    adaware are the good guys, just stay away from the porn ;)
  • flatcat
    flatcat
    Metaphysical Composer Posts: 863
    Fuck off:

    Ms. Artois for being such a succulent lady of the night
    A lack of glasses while working on the computer for the day, squinty eyes and a major workload to finish.
    Cursed work.
  • pat
    pat
    dilaudid Posts: 9,337
    That bastard Oliver bloke on spooks last night. He got me well angry.
    My mate's revelation that he's a member of the tory party today.
    Table-Football hoggers.

    does relieve the stress this thread.
  • chips
    chips
    Mr chips to you Posts: 4,401
    fuck off:

    alan titmarsh.
    canadian chocolate (tastes like fuckin wax)
    people who write - "lol" , "m8" or "roflmao" or any of that stupid shit.
    people who type emails WITH CAPS LOCK ON.
  • flatcat
    flatcat
    Metaphysical Composer Posts: 863
    roflmao
  • pat
    pat
    dilaudid Posts: 9,337
    fuck off:

    Micael Moore. But then again:

    fuck off:
    bush administration
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    people whon dont puntucate and rite evrything in lower case with no punctation and rddled with spling mistakes can just fuck write of
  • gray
    gray
    i still want paying Posts: 5,149
    aw i wanted to say alan titmarch
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    I promise that wasn't a dig at anybody here...I myself am also guilty.

    Alan Titwank can definitely fuck off though.
  • chips
    chips
    Mr chips to you Posts: 4,401
    brit_isles_neand_r_1.jpg
    this could well be an improvement.
    Is this what our ancestors looked like? God help us.
    bleedin buffoon.
  • FrancescoSforza
    FrancescoSforza
    Registered User Posts: 22
    Fuck off:

    Leading web development companies from india with 7 years experience or 1250 websites made in 2 years, offering to design a website for 30$
    US clients requiring "patriotic" color scheme for their website design
  • mark
    mark
    Hey Alan, nice rope! Posts: 734
    Fuck off the pro-hunting lobby/countryside alliance. Nobody, and I mean nobody, buys your ridiculous environmental/employment arguments, believes your insane assertions about a ban on hunting eroding country living or believes your trumped up statistics that say we are actually in favour of hunting.

    Nobody except yourselves.

    Your campaiging consists of hitting the streets of London braying like farmyard animals, all manner of ludicrous 'protests', dumping dead animals in our parks and storming parliament like a rabid, crazed rag week troupe led by some twat named Otis.

    Simply fuck off will you.
  • tomson
    tomson
    The in between is mine Posts: 4,208
    mark wrote:
    Fuck off the pro-hunting lobby/countryside alliance. Nobody, and I mean nobody, buys your ridiculous environmental/employment arguments, believes your insane assertions about a ban on hunting eroding country living or believes your trumped up statistics that say we are actually in favour of hunting.

    Nobody except yourselves.

    Your campaiging consists of hitting the streets of London braying like farmyard animals, all manner of ludicrous 'protests', dumping dead animals in our parks and storming parliament like a rabid, crazed rag week troupe led by some twat named Otis.

    Simply fuck off will you.

    Well said. Fuck off the lot of 'em.
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